Teacher = "Which is more important to us, the sun or the moon?"
Student = "The moon".
Teacher = "Why?"
Student = "The moon gives us light at night when we need it but the sun gives us light
only in the day time when we don't need it"…..
Teacher = Tum math mein fail ho gaye..?
Student = Main kya karta, Aapne hi galat padhaya tha…
Kabhi 4 or 4 aath(8) kaha kabhi 6 or 2 aath kaha or kabhi 5 or 3 aath bataya….
Teacher: “Mein Tumhari Jaan Nikaal Dungi” Ishe English Mein Batao......... Haryanvi Student: Tahne English Chhor Manney Hath Tho Laa K Dekh..
Govt school kar bachhe kisi ko ghaseet kar school le ja rahe the, Ye dekh kar 1 Aadmi bola: Jane do Beta, Ye Khud School aa jayega Bachhe: Ye bachha nahi master ji hai.....
MUNNU: Apne Mje Insan Chora Hi Kab Hy? Roz Murga Bna Deti Ho:P
Teacher: “Why are you so late?” Student: “Someone told me to go to hell.” Teacher: “Why did that make you late to class?” Student: “I couldn’t find it at first, but now here I am.”
A Good Teacher Is Who Tells To Study Hard… . . . But . . . A Best Teacher Is Who Stands Outside The Examination Hall N Shouts.. . . . “OYE CHECKING WALE AA GAYE APNE APNE CHITS CHUPA LO..!!
Teacher: how old are you? . Student: check the register.. . Teacher: where are you from? . Student: check in school info.. . Teacher: whom do u love most mom or dad? . Student: ask my heart. . Teacher: stupid where is your heart? . . . Student: ask your daughter!
An Engineer failed in Exam & decided to make a deal with Professor. Engineer: Sir, Can I ask u one question Professor: Yes. Engineer: If u can answer dis question, i will accept my final marks, if u can’t, u have to give me “A”. Professor agreed. Engineer asked: “What is legal but not logical, logical but not legal & neither legal nor logical?” Professor thought about it for hrs & pondered no answer. He had to finally give up as he really did not know. He gave the engineer his “A”. Then he asked Engineer for the answer. Engineer answered: Sir, u are 65, married to 28 yrs old woman, this is legal but not logical. Ur wife, is having an affair with a 23 year old boy, dis is logical but not legal. Ur wife’s boyfriend has failed in his exam & yet u have given him an “A”, this is neither logical nor legal.Professor Shocked!!!
Ek Professor Restaurant Mein Gaya Aur Sirf Roti Order Ki . . . Waiter Ne Roti Lakar Serve Ki, Aur Professor Khaali Plate Me Roti Dubo Kar Khane Laga . . . . Waiter Hairaan Hokar: “Sir Ye Aap Kya Kar Rahe Ho Plate To Khaali Hai” . . . . . . . Professor: “Shut Up! Main Ek Maths Teacher Hun Aur Maine Daal Suppose Ki Huyi Hai.“
Professor: Tum 20 saal ki Larki se shadi karo ge ya apne se 20 saal bari se? Student: Sir! Depend karta hai ke kon Khoobsurat hai ap ki beti ya ap ki wife.
Punjabi Application to the Head Master! Guzarish he k mera hun school aan nu dil nai krda Tusi bachian vi alag kr ditian ne Tey sadi class vich ik v kuri nai haigi Tay madam v koi khas pataka nai Hor nai tay kuj “kam valiyan” he soniyan rakh lavo! Bari meharbani! Tuada Faithfull studnt, PAPPU
Teacher: Hume Gharibon k Sath pyar se paish aana chahiye. . Studnt: Acha ab me samjha. . Teacher: kiya? . Studnt: PAPA aksar Nokrani ko galay Q lagatay hen.
Teacher:jo ander aane k liye sab se chota sentence bole ga usay gift mile ga Eng child: may i cum in? Urdu child: mai andr a skta ho? Punjabi: . AAWAAN?
Teacher: Why are you late? santa: Because of the sign. Teacher: What sign? santa: The one that says, “School Ahead, Go Slow.”
Teacher:tell me ur name in english? Stdnt:after 2 min “Long Life Oven” Teacher:iska kia matlb hai? Stdnt:”Umer Daraz Bhatti”
Teacher: JAWANI owr BURHAPAY mai kia farq hota hai? . Student: JAWANI mai mobile mai HASEENO ke numbers hotay hai, owr BURHAPAY mai HAKEEMO ke
Side effect of teaching! A Teacher Went To A Restaurant, He Wanted To See The Menu But He Forgot What It Is Called; He Asked Waiter, ” khane ka Syllabus Lana Zara”…… Dedicated 2 Teachers
The most funniest situation in student’s life: . When we have no idea what to write in paper and supervisor comes and say “wind up your papers”
Three reasons to give Exams . 1- You can spend 3 hours in self-medication 2- You can complete your sleep 3- You can see your teacher being bore who normally bores you
A student waz asked to write a signboard 4 da traffic rules near the school He wrote:Drive carefully!Dnt kill the students,wait for the Teachers!
New Teacher: anybody who thinks he is stupid, stand up pappu stoodup Teacher: R U stupid? Pappu: “nhi, Aap akeli khari theen mujhe acha nhi lag raha tha”
Teacher: Agar apna character sudharna hai to sab auraton ko MAA kaha karo. Student: Madam is se mera character to theek rahega, par mere baap ka bigad jayega.
Girl: Tum Kya Karte ho? Boy: Bahut Bade College Mein Logo Ka Admission Karwata Hun. Girl: Kaun Se College? Boy: ‘IIN’, Recharge Ki Dukan Hai Apni!
Announcement in a SCHOOL: . . . . . . . . Students who’ve Parked their cycles in front of d Gate, Plz move their cycles to the Parking area!! After 30 mins another
announcement: The 400 students who went to move 10 cycles plz come back to classes!
Madam to boy- kaha hai copy kaha hai pen boy- jbse tme dekha kya copy kya pen . . Tere mast mast do nain mere dil ka le gye chain gayab hao copy aur kho gayi pen!
Socho agar MASTER Log Film banate to naam kya rakhte- -Kabhi chalk kabhi duster -Kabhi TET kabhi CTET -Kaho na EXAM hai -BSA no.1 -Ham class le chuke sanam -Aap mujhe teacher lagne lage -Ham aapke school me padhate hain -Welcome to school -Bhagna Mana Hai (school se) -Master Bachche Aur MDM -Padhna Hai Tere School Me -Ek Master Do Shiksha Mitra -Jab-Jab School Khule -Rab Ne Bana Diya Master.. -SOME HORROR MOVIES -Tadapta teacher -Khooni pradhan -Shikari BSA -MDM ka lootera -Checking ka chakkar
Father: Beta..!
Tu ne Engineering Ke 4 Saalo Mein Sab Se Mushkil Kaam Kon Sa Seekha..?
Son: Bus Ki Chatt Pe baith K.. Tezz Hawaon Mein 1 Teeli Se 3 Cigarette Jalana..
*USA* all the best or exam, Jon thanks
*India* Teeka laga! dahi aur cheeni kha! Nakal maarro! Fail hua toh belt se pitai
4 Students: 1 of HARVARD 1 of OXFORD 1 of TEXAS & Santa Singh of IIN
1 Common Question:- What is the Fastest thing in the World?
Student of HARVARD: Light
Student of OXFORD: Thought
Student of TEXAS: Blink of an Eye
SANTA SINGH of IIN: Loose Motion!
Because
Last Night I Was Lying On My Bed & Before I Could ‘Blink’, ‘Think’ or ‘Turn on the Light’, It was all Over..
Navjot Singh Siddhu’s Son in School. Teacher: What is a Noun? Son: Mohtarma.. arjh kiya hai. Kutta bhi hota hai apni galli me King. Noun is the name of any Person, Place or Thing..!!!!
My teachers always told me that if I didn’t study hard enough I’d end up working at McDonalds.
Well I proved them wrong, I got a job at KFC today.
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